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Don't You Forget About Me ...
The courage to start again, finding a new normal, and a sense of belonging.
I'm slowly creating a new normal. I know it's customary to want your old (fill-in-the-blank-with-whatever-it-is-you-had-and-lost) thing back, but I'm learning that in order to grow, our thinking has to evolve. From March of 2022 until last November, I'd experienced one loss after another -- whoever decided that, on average, three days per year is enough for paid bereavement leave never lost anyone, let alone four people in one year. The final straw was when I lost my brother, my biggest supporter, right before Thanksgiving. I'm not making excuses, just explaining my absence, and if I'm being honest and transparent, I had just enough energy left to care for my kids, get some work done, and maybe eat a little something. I was grieving. I am grieving.
Why am I sharing this? Sometimes the things that happen in our personal lives impact us professionally. Losing a loved one or caretaking for a sick relative or loved one in hospice care or whatever momentous situation in our lives often eclipses anything in our professional lives. We end up doing just enough to stay functional. Although I can't say I'm back fully (whatever that means), an old version of me is falling away, and I'm interested in seeing who emerges from all of this.
I want to do more of what brings me joy ...and guess what? It's being with you. I'm speaking at a conference for the first time in a while and couldn't be more thrilled. My big brother was front and center cheering me on the last time I spoke at a conference, so doing this is an homage to him. Neil Gaiman said, "the moment that you feel that, just possibly, you're walking down the street naked, exposing too much of your heart and your mind and what exists on the inside showing too much of yourself. That's the moment you may be starting to get it right." I want to get it right.
What about you? Have you ever had to start again after a tough period in your life? How did you do it? Tell me, you know I love hearing from you.
Join me March 8 & 9 along with thousands of women online for real-talk leadership, career advice, technical resume building, networking & more in celebration of International Women's Day. My talk, for this free conference, Girl Geek X Elevate Conference and Career Fair, is about How to Navigate Gatekeeping Culture in Tech will be Thursday 2:10 EST/11:10 PST. See you there.
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I’m just watching as many of the DEI efforts that blazed on the scene during the height of COVID days and BLM are now being rescinded or reshaped.
And once again if I need a little inspiration, the inter (of the) nets remain undefeated. Did you watch the Super Bowl Half-Time Show? Yes? Well, no shade to RiRi but the star was Deaf performer Justina Miles. Talk about inclusion, Justina was a beautiful sight to behold.
Thanks so much for supporting InclusivelyHer. As always, thanks for reading. It’s my hope in sharing stories and other bits of information, you’ll be inspired in your own journey.
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